Just Say Thanks?

Do you have colleagues that send e-mails with demands masked as requests. "I need you to do this by the end of the day". Or my favorite...the e-mails flagged as high importance. As if their emergency has anything to do with me - you waited until the last minute and now you want me to disrupt my schedule to accommodate you. Oh and you think it's ok, because you put the "THANKS!" or even better "thx" at the end of the message.

Can you tell it's a pet peeve of mine? I would love it if I could change the way that those folks communicate and make requests, but generally I can't. I can only control my communications and not be THAT person who makes ill-mannered requests.

So...how not to be that person...
1. Consider calling the person first or walking to their office. In person requests can be a little bit more personal. E-mail can leave too much to interpretation. Also when you call or speak directly with someone, you can gauge what else he/she has on their plate and where your request falls on the priority list.

2. Use some of your momma's home training (if you didn't get it, Ms. Frances has enough for the both of us). Iff you really need to make a last minute request (even if it's not your fault that it's late), ask, don't tell. While it may be of no real consequence to you, asking versus demanding really does make the other person feel better.

3. Finally, try to limit last minute requests. You don;t want to get the reputation that you are always late; or better still you don't want folks to stop accommodating your requests. You may find that folks have ready made excuses when they see you coming...



So what to do when you get another *&^% last minute request (particularly through e-mail):

1. Close the e-mail, close your eyes, breathe in and out, then open the e-mail again. You have to make sure that the negative energy and frustration doesn't overtake you. Try to consider how you would react if your best friend made the request. Please believe - this is the toughest one for me!

2. Try to set boundaries about your schedule and timeline. You may have to suck it up this time, but consider how you can let others know how best to make requests and your ideal timeline for completion.

3. Clarify expectations. When you get the request, don't just go off to the races to get the project or task done. Make sure you clearly understand what is being asked of you, because if it's a last minute request, you probably have no time to waste. Last thing you need is to rush through something with muddied expectations, only to find that you've done it incorrectly and you are held responsible for poor outcomes.


Maybe how someone asks for something shouldn't matter...but for me it does; so I know I've got to manage how I react and also ensure that I don't fall into the same traps when I have a tight deadline.